Dear Malachi,

You are growing up quickly. I don't know how well I am handling it. About 2 weeks ago, you told me, "I hate you." I know you didn't mean it, but it made me sad. I hadn't done anything to truly upset you to make you say that. It took some time for me to realize that you had learned that from someone at daycare who is usually acting bad and is probably no properly punished for it. We have had a discussion or 2 about that, as well as other behaviors, and you seem to understand. We need to work more with you and teach you how to handle your feelings better---something I wish I could do with every child who is not properly cared for at home.

It also made me think about how much I want to be able to stay home with you. I've had that desire for the past 2 years when I realized that other people were not teaching and guiding you the way I wanted. It is not that anyone is failing, but I like to be in control of the situation. The only other person that I trust to raise you right is your father. I love you so much and want you to grow up to be a respectful young man with a desire to serve the Lord. I feel we are doing all right, but I just want to know what goes in your ear and what you see, all the time.

In November, you brought home a paper with your name written by you, for the first time. It is still on the fridge. I will probably keep that forever. You are so smart and catch on to so much. You can count to twenty now and are excellent with your letters and numbers, as a whole. The VPK program at daycare has been wonderful and just what you needed to "catch up" academically. I have no doubt you will be ready for Kindergarten next year. You LOVE structure and consistency, which, I believe, will make you extremely successful in school. You love to learn. I hope we can keep this learning ingrained in you.

I love the way you run to meet me when I get home and throw your arms around me. Sometimes I don't like when you ask so many questions that don't always make sense to me, or talk to hear yourself talk; but I am so thankful that you can talk normally and have absolutely no speech problems from being tongue-tied and having your tongue clipped. I love to hear your sing, especially worship songs. You love church and learning your verse each week. It makes me so proud. I know we have a LOOOOOOOOONG way to go until we are out of the woods, and you know exactly who you are in Christ, but I am so grateful.

I love you, Malachi James! You are becoming a wonderful young man.

-Momma