Results

The doctor finally called me yesterday afternoon with the biopsy results.

It is a confirmed benign tumor. It should never become malignant but may grow (especially if more children are in our future). So, I'm cool with having a little extra something in me and not having it removed. I'm glad it is "nothing."

This experience has been a good one. I found out a lot about myself and my relationship with the Lord. God took something bad and turned it into good to draw me closer to him. How cool!

Biopsy

Today was the biopsy day for the lump in my breast. Everything went well this morning. They took 3 samples. I am a little sore and am keeping the "ice pack" on the area. I haven't taken any Tylenol yet, so all is well. The doctor seemed pretty sure that it was benign after looking at it and taking the samples, but I will know for sure in the next day or 2. I cam home after the biopsy and took a nap. Daniel took me out to lunch. I came back home and took another nap. I've just been resting and watching tv. It's nice to have a "day off" even if I got poked with way too many needles this morning. All is well. If you don't hear anything else, then assume that no news is good news. I'm glad that there have been no complications, thus far. Praise the Lord!

Accidents happen, right?

Malachi had an accident today. I don't know why. He hasn't had a pee-pee accident in MONTHS. I didn't have extra clothes for him, so he got to run around the church in a t-shirt and pull up. Yes, his shoes & socks were wet, too. After working at the church for a little while, Z & I ran to a local consignment shop and picked him up a nice-looking & nice-smelling pair of pants for less than $3.

Why in the world would he have an accident? Maybe he was upset because his momma was rushing out the door this morning, and he wanted to spend time with her.

Why would that cause him to get upset? Maybe because his momma left him sleeping in bed on Wednesday morning and did not return until 10pm on Friday night.

Why would he be cranky for momma being gone? Maybe Momma told him she would wake him up at 10pm, Friday night to tell him she was home and give him a kiss, and then Malachi chose not to go back to sleep until almost midnight. I can't help it the kid missed me.

Hmmm... I think there is a correlation.

By the way, those of you who have been wanting to talk to me, I'm sorry. Last week was crazy and a learning process. This week was busy with cleaning, packing, taking 175 8th graders to the OBX of NC, and then practice for the Easter Trilogy starting tomorrow! Monday will be my biopsy day. Wow, just thinking about all that makes me tired! I did survive most of it already, though:)

Scary but a "God-thing"

On Monday, I went to the OB/GYN for my yearly "womanly" appointment. While there, the doc discovered a lump in my breast. I was scheduled for an ultrasound on Friday (yes, I had to wait that long). The doc reassured me it was nothing but wanted to take the precaution. I believed her and went on my way. As I walked away and headed to my car, the weight of the situation began to hit me. I broke. Tears and doubts began to flood my brain like never before. It was scary to think of the future and a lump.

Daniel and I have been under immense pressure the past few weeks due to the opening of a satellite campus of First Assembly that we felt called to be a part of. Then, I got hit by the news. It was all I could do to keep it together (barely). Daniel and I ended up having an impromptu date night on Tuesday to help "clear our heads." It was nice and just what we needed.

Wednesday rolled around, and I was still struggling with the issue. I was supposed to "skip" church to go to another meeting and costume fitting. I chose not to go because I just felt that I needed to be in the Bible study. We have been focusing on the minor profits. Before the study, I thought that I was crazy and would get nothing from it, BUT most of the study was for me and my situation. It was freeing.

I woke up Thursday morning with peace in my heart and mind and great anticipation for Friday afternoon to see if all my fret was in vain.

Today (Friday) was my appointment at the Imagery center (in the same complex as Z's ENT and where his tubes were put in). Daniel, of course, went with me. As I watched on the monitor during the ultrasound, I could tell that it was more than just a normal "lump" by the way the tech was spending time on that spot and measuring and such. Then, the pics were taken to the doc. He came in for a look himself.

He told me that he was hoping it was a cyst (no problems, let it be). It wasn't that. It appeared to be a tumor. The good news was that it also seemed to be benign. He gave me 2 options, a needle biopsy with local anesthesia OR to go ahead and schedule a full removal of the .5cm area and surrounding, just to make sure. There is a small chance it is malignant, but the signs don't point there. Most likely, the needle test (which is what I chose) will show that it is benign, and we'll just keep a close eye on it for the many years to come. It is not expected to grow anymore.

So, on Monday, May 30th, I will go in again to the center to be locally numbed and have a needle stuck in me. Fun! I'm thankful that all seems to be going well.

Through all this I have been "finding myself" again and who I am in Christ. The past few years, I have had control of my life. God has constantly been calling me to trust him and let go of the reigns. I haven't. Now that I have been faced with an issue that I have no control over, whatsoever, I have begun to let go of the control issue in my life. I have such a peace. If it is malignant, then God knows, and I trust that He will provide total healing. If it is not, then I trust that all will be well in the future. I am using this time as a life lesson and relationship lesson. My stress levels have been much higher since August. I have taken life too seriously and tried to control my own life. The problem is, it is not mine to control. There has been such a weight lifted off my shoulders. I'm fine with whatever the outcome is.

As my teammate keeps reminding me, if it's not breast cancer, don't stress. The situation will be over soon. She's a breast cancer survivor. I've learned so much from her. She's one year from retirement, and has "done it all," for the most part. She's my sounding board and sound mind at work. I thank God for her. Now I truly can remind myself that life is short, and that God is in control. He deserves the glory for whatever happens in the next few weeks and months. He's worthy, & I am truly blessed.

Nothing New Right Now

I have nothing "new" to report right now. We have been busy, and I am exhausted. I can't seem to find time to catch a break or get a breath before all the laundry piles up again or another school event happens. We have been trying harder to eat more at home and be healthier, but we can't with the crazy schedule.

Ezekiel is talking more than ever (as he does each week). Saturday, he came up to me while I was doing something (don't remember), and said, "Mommy, you doin'?" It was so cute!

I got upset this morning b/c Malachi wouldn't put his own clothes on for the 459th time today. I just started to cry. I was frustrated. Ezekiel had made me wrestle his clothes on, and I was tired at 7:15am. Z was in "timeout" in his crib when he noticed me crying. I realized later that he had stopped crying (and trying to pull his clothes off). He waited for me to finish fussing at Malachi and waited for me to pick him up. Then, he gave me the biggest (most wonderful) hug! I carried him into the bathroom where he kept an eye on me in the mirror. How sweet is that boy!

I just wish Malachi wasn't going through the TRYING THREES. Every morning and evening it is a battle to get clothes on and a battle to go poop (before he doesn't have time to go). It is routine. Why is it so difficult? I love that little boy so dearly. I just wish we were through these times sooner.

Grand Opening for Concord First Assembly 29North will be Sunday. There is a lot to do. I'm sure I won't get a nap that day. Maybe I'll plan on being "sick" on Monday. Just thinking about it makes me tired.

Recent Pictures & Snow Days

I can't remember a time that we haven't been busy. Last month was an extremely trying time for us financially & emotionally, but the past few weeks have been very rewarding and enjoyable. The boys were able to use their birthday/Christmas money to go to Build-a-Bear on Friday. Ezekiel picked out a Bobcats uniform with a basketball. Malachi chose a fireman's uniform.

The boys enjoy taking baths together and playing with the toys. Malachi loves to "swim" in the tub, and, SURPRISE, "monkey see, monkey do."

Hey, there, cutie! Our big 3-year-old.
If you look closely at his left eye, you can see the scab he got when he dove into the corner of a table.

Who's cute? Our little 2-year-old.

This was our "snowman" from about 2 weeks ago. The snow would not pack, and I can't take credit for this little snowman, anyway. A neighbor from down the street came out to play with Malachi, and this is all they could do with about 30 minutes. I told you, the snow didn't want to pack. It was too powdery.

Today, we got our 3rd snow this year. It was preceded by 2 days of rain & about 2 hours of freezing rain. It made it pack well but very slushy. Of course, we had no school today. This was my quick attempt at a snowman. It has already melted & while we were making it, Kiev kept knocking it over and eating the eyes, nose, mouth, etc. No fun!

This video is the day after his party. I was trying to get Ezekiel to talk about his party the way he had earlier, but, of course, he didn't cooperate. Malachi enjoyed being in the spotlight. The Foof chair is always a favorite place to play.

Ezekiel's Birthday

Ezekiel celebrated his 2nd birthday today with party and special events. He is so fun to play things up with. We started a few days ago working on teaching Ezekiel that he is going to be TWO. Yesterday, I took the boys to the party store to get the supplies for the party today. Malachi & I ended up singing happy birthday to him in the check out line. How fun:)

We had worked hard on Thursday night to get some serious cleaning done. We were working even harder last night...then Daniel decided we needed to paint the second bathroom Which, it actually didn't take that long to paint, and we got to bed about 11:30pm. Not too shabby.

Today, Daniel had to work a few hours at the church before the party at 10:30am. Yes, I said 10:30! It was great!!! All I had to do was get showered and put the veggie tray together. Daniel bakes and iced the Mickey Mouse cake last night (after painting). The family & friends arrived. Daniel put out the bounce house, which the kids LOVED. We did Mickey Mouse stamped fingers. Then it was have snacks, cut the cake, and open presents. We were done by noon, and we didn't have to feed anyone a full meal.

Of the 5 birthday parties I have "planned" as a mom, and the numerous I have attended in the past few years, this was by far the best! I was worried about having it at our little house, but it all worked out well. I can't say that our neighbors appreciated our crowded little street or the noisy bounce house before 11am, but we had a great time!

When we got Ezekiel up this morning, we sang to him (all 3 of us). He wore his favorite Mickey Mouse t-shirt that he got for Christmas. AND we were lucky enough to have "story-time" Saturday on Disney, so it was 2 hours of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse while I got ready and made a few finishing touches before people began arriving. It's unusual for me to allow them to watch that much tv, but I knew they would be busy, and I didn't want them running all over the house early.

Ezekiel loved the singing of Happy Birthday and would insert his name as he sung it on his own, occasionally. Mickey Mouse was an excellent theme. He didn't get a ton of stuff, and it was all useful and loved by the boys. Not to mention, he brought in over $50 cash. Target & Build-a-Bear will love us.

This evening we took Ezekiel for his favorite meal of pizza to one of our former frequenting spots. We splurged (because we haven't been out to eat in a long time) and got pizza, lasagna, garlic knots, & cheesy garlic bread. All-in-all it was a fabulous day, and I couldn't have imagined a better experience of Ezekiel on his 2nd birthday.

Happy 2nd Birthday, Ezekiel Luke!!!

Money! Ezekiel shared with his great-grandma.

Malachi & Renee wanted to help Ezekiel play with his toys.
Renee is Ezekiel's "girlfriend." They hug on each other and love to play together.
There are already people in Renee's family planning the wedding:)

Ezekiel wanted to keep showing Grandpa his new toys.

Daniel blew up the Bounce House. Ezekiel, Malachi, Riley, & Isiah had a great time jumping.

Mickey Mouse birthday cake

Malachi-isms

Today, I told Malachi to go wash his hands. He went to the bathroom, turned the water on high & hot, and began to wash. He then said, "Mommy, pull my hands up!" Meaning: pull my sleeves up. How funny!

"Broccoli, Sara Lee, gotta be, VeggieTales." - Celery

Conversations with Ezekiel & Malachi

At dinner tonight...

Z - (pooted) I poot
Daniel - yes, you did
Me - say excuse me
Z - skooz - ee, I poot
Z - I poot (much louder and in the cutest voice)
M & D - lots of giggles (tried to suppress them but only encourage the Z-man)
Z - Daddy, I poot! I poot! I poot!


At 4:45am (this morning)...

Malachi - (knock, knock, knock) Mommy!
Me - (opens door) What's wrong, sweetie?
MJ - Mommy, I said bleh in my bed.
M - did you through up in your bed.
MJ - Yes, I said bleh in my bed.
M - did you get any on you?
MJ - No, I said bleh on my bed.
M - OK. go lay on the couch while I clean it up.
(Thankfully, it wasn't much and he felt better by about 10am.)

Random-ness

A conversation with Malachi about a week ago...

MJ - "Mommy, I'm getting big."
Mom - "Yes, you are."
MJ - "My legs are getting big."
Mom - "Yes, they are sweetie!"
MJ - "My legs are as big as yours, Mommy!!!"
Mom - "Yes, dear, thank you:)"

Fun outside on a warm December day, playing with Christmas presents

Hey, Mommy!

All aboard the Choo-choo frain.

Chu-chu-chu-chu-choo-choo

Snow & Dentist

Last Tuesday (day after MLK, Jr. Day), we had about 2 inches of snow with some rain underneath that caused a little bit of ice. So, there was no school. AND IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY!!! I enjoyed hanging out with my boys and having a leisurely dinner that evening when everything had melted. Here are some pictures of both the boys "playing" in snow for the first time in their short, little lives.

Malachi was almost afraid of the snow. Ezekiel enjoyed walking through it and kicking a ball into the street. Go figure.




Also, on Wednesday (this week), Malachi had his first dentist appointment. He sat and watched me first. I tried to show him how "unpainful" it was. He wouldn't sit in the seat by himself. He sat with me. He was all right for the first 5 minutes. After that, I had to use one of my legs to restrain his from kicking. I used one arm to restrain his arms for flailing, and I used the other arm to keep his head as still as possible. He fought through half of the "brushing," all of the flossing, and all of the fluoride treatment. Then he picked out stickers & toothbrushes for he and Z. He was fine after that. Here's a picture of how splotchy and red he was when it was finished.


BUT...Since then, he has talked about and asked me to help with brushing in circles. Last night he let me floss his teeth. Tonight he wanted me to floss his teeth. Wow!!! He'll do fine next time. He doesn't like new things, so once it is over once, he tends to remember and be better.

We also found out at this appointment that he has two teeth that grew in fused together. She said his grown-up teeth should not follow suit. She said that since his teeth were so close together we need to floss at least a few times a week, and that it was highly likely he would need braces due to his mouth being tight before the big teeth come in. Yay! I can see the bills piling up already. J/K;)

P.S. I know I never finished Christmas pictures. I'll have to get on that one day sometime soon (lots of sarcasm intended).

-isms

Malachi-isms

• "It's a-hind me." We're working on BEhind instead of a-hind.
• "I have full hands!" - My hands are full.
• "My-lick-ky" - Malachi
• "Zee-kiel" - Ezekiel
  
• I love you like a Licky (what you do when you stick out your togue and lick your mouth). It's a long, silly story that our 3 year old turned a funny phrase into a new obsession. How cute!
• "nu-ver" - never
  

Ezekiel-isms

• "Ky-kyyy" - Malachi
• "da-que, Mommy" - Thank you, Mommy (or any others)
• "bwa-ka-wee, seg-a-ree, ga-ga-bee, weggi-whales" - Broccoli, Celery, gotta be, VeggieTales
• "Ba-paw" - Grandpa
• "Ba-ka-maa" - Spiderman
• "Zee-kull" - Ezekiel
• "Dat skeer me" - That scared me
• "Yays" - Yes
• "kweem" - Lightning McQueen
• "ta-tart" - Poptart - his breakfast of choice that he asks for every single morning by name
• "piece-aah" - pizza
  

In Memory

Last night we lost a very dear loved one. Daniel's grandfather passed away about 8:30pm last night. It wasn't totally unexpected, but we expected him to live a little longer. Now he is with his Savior, worshipping at his feet. I can't lie that I am a little jealous, but we miss him here on earth so much. It was hard and took a lot of thought as to how we were going to explain it to Malachi. He took it well, but I don't think Daniel did. Daniel is now the spiritual leader of his whole family. I know he understands and is much more stable than many in his family, but it doesn't make it much easier. We have been caring for Daniel's grandmother and will continue to make sure that she is all right. She is doing well for the circumstance. They were married for over 50 years.

The boys will miss wrestling with you, Paw-Paw. Daniel will miss your songs and jokes. We'll see you again, Paw-Paw Bill! We can't wait to be reunited with you and are encouraged that all the pain has left your body. We miss you.

-Daniel, Morgan, Malachi, & Ezekiel

Christmas Pics

Ok. So here are some of the pictures from Christmas. You probably don't care to see them all, so I'll just chose a few.

On Christmas Eve-Eve we let the boys open one present each. We chose their Wonder Pets items. The next mid-morning (Christmas Eve) we let the boys open their other 2 presents under the tree from us. Malachi got a Spiderman costume & HiHo Cherry-O to play with others. Ezekiel got a box with 4 different sets of 2-car trains & a pull (with a string) Thomas with 2 cars. That Evening Uncle David, Aunt Chelle, Grampa & Grammy came over for dinner and presents. The boys got mega blocks and lots of Cars stuff & a few Micky Mouse (for Z).

Christmas day started with a few little things in the stockings at our house and the reading of the Bible story of Jesus' birth. We then went to Great-grandma Carol's for breakfast and fun with Grandpa Rick, Nana, Aunt Miranda, Aunt Tabith, & Uncle Ricky. The boys got a racing/crashing cars set, other Cars stuff, and a stocking full of goodies. They have several favorites but enjoy the Cars "bistro" set just for them and the 2 lap tables.

After breakfast we headed to Grandpa Phil's house with Grandma Cathy, Great-grandma Geraldine & Aunt Krisitin to eat lunch and the second round of presents that day. The boys got tractors and a car to play with outside. They also got a train set, globe, and a few other things.

We were exhausted after the day and had no need for dinner, but we had a great time. It's nice to have the holidays to be with family.

I'm Stuffed

It's all over now. I'll post pictures soon. I've got a lot to get accomplished in the next week. I'm not sure how it is all going to get done. We are overloaded with toys and goodies after the holidays. Daniel and I have been deciding where to put the addition to the house for all the BIG toys the boys racked up at Christmas.

Both the boys are feeling better, but Malachi's drippy nose has been hanging on. Ezekiel had a pretty nasty cold a little over a week ago. Malachi caught it, and it lead to an ear infection. He woke up from his nap on Christmas Eve-Eve with 102.4 fever. It's funny that with all his horrible symptoms, he never complained of an ear infection. Apparently, Ezekiel had a "sort-of" ear infection with some drainage out of his tubes, too. We had to get drops for that. I hope that all will go much better over the next week.

On Christmas morning, We read the Christmas story and talked about it being Jesus' birthday. We asked the boys if they wanted to sing Happy Birthday to Jesus. Ezekiel immediately started singing the birthday song, so we put in Jesus' name.

"Wrestling" Daddy

Malachi said that he wanted to wrestle Daddy. It turned into, "let me stand on his back and jump off while counting." And, yes, he is wearing a Bob the Builder outfit handed down from friends at school. Of course, Ezekiel had to get in on the action, too.

The Christmas Parties Have Begun

We have A LOT of FAMILY around us, SO we had our first family Christmas party today. The boys had fun with their cousins on Daniel's Dad's side. It was a 2pm (so not good for naptime), so Malachi had no nap, and I tried to put Ezekiel down early. It kind of worked. Malachi was fine. Z was not horrible but oh-so irritable. It doesn't help that Z has been getting over a HORRIBLE cold (although, Z's colds are always bad. He rarely has easy colds and gets them often). Anywho. Malachi has caught his cold (& Daniel, too). There weren't a lot of presents (which none of us minded), but we did have a good time. The boys got pj's & matching Mr. Potato Heads. We've got plans for Christmas Eve & day. I've also got plans with lots of friends. More to come.What you can't tell from this picture of Ezekiel in the background is that he kept throwing the paper from his presents on the floor to try to mimic what Daddy had done with his wrapping paper towards his dad.

Wonder Pets

As we got out the Christmas decorations, we came across our little red & green towels that we usually put on the stove. After hanging in that spot for a few days, Malachi thought that the red & green would make great capes. He called he and his brother Wonder Pets (one of their favorite shows right now. In fact, when I took the boys to Toys R Us to scope out what there was to be had and decide on what we really wanted to get the boys on our little budget, Malachi kept going on and on and on and on about the Wonder Pet's flyboat. It's a good thing we bought that for him, because he still has his heart set on it 3 weeks later). I grabbed 2 safety pins left over from the 5.2 million I have after each Calvary Kid's Consignment Sale. Malachi & Ezekiel had a great time pretending they were Tuck & Ming-Ming. I was actually surprised that this was the first time that we had created capes for our boys.

Word Explosion

Ezekiel has had an explosion of words and thoughts lately. He's saying thank you all the time and sorry when he does something wrong. He'll respond to some questions with "ok." It's good conversations and thoughts. He's had the ability and has talked in ununderstandable sentences for sometime, but to understand more and more what he is saying is just precious. It's like all of a sudden he realized how to talk to us in complex thoughts. I love this time in their lives. 18 months on is just a blast! I like the early months, but there is just something special about being there when they are taking in so much information and figuring out how to use it.

"Wa-woo" - water
"Ga-gi-go-goo" - God is so good (the song)
"eye-di-ooo" - I love you
"da-kyoo" - thank you

just to name a few

A Christmas Lights Visit

Tonight we took Malachi, Ezekiel, & Jasmine (the boys' cousin) to see a house we found last year in China Grove. The dude's house is CRAZY! I tried different modes for my camera, but none of them came out exactly right. All 3 kids had a blast looking at all the lights, inflatable santas & snowmen, and trains, etc. I think we overheard the man saying that there were over 20 trains in the case, and I don't have a clue how many lights.

It was a great plot by my husband. A 6 year old, a 3 year old, and a 21 mo. old running around our tiny little house for several hours was not going to work. It must also be said that Jasmine & Malachi always seem to have huge arguments because they are both strong-willed and would "argue with the wall (if it would talk back)." Ezekiel was actually a little dejected that he lost his playmate (his big bro) when Jasmine came in. I was very surprised that they all did pretty well this evening. It's a good thing, too. I don't know if we'll be ready for #3 any time soon, though.